Join for FREE | Take the Tour Lost Password?
Shop deviantART for the
holidays and save BIG!
Click here! :holly:
[x]

deviantART

:love:
 

Take my Hand.... by =Nenyeh:iconNenyeh:

Categories Literature > Poetry > Narrative > Spoken Word


                                                 Alone
                                                          confused
                                                my heart beats fast
                                  this ship I'm on,
                                                          now leaves the port
                                  leaves my love behind.
             
                                  This darkness
                                                                   it's huge
                                  empty thoughts
                 cloud my mind                       make it end
                                       take my hand
                                                            and take my pain
                                    tonight I need you more than ever
                   my voice is silent
                                              my hand is cold
                                     I need you here beside me.
©2009 =Nenyeh
:iconnenyeh:

Author's Comments

Randomness.

The random layout is to show the mixed up emotions.... ^^;

Critiques


Thank you for your Critique

You are not logged in.

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconnarutofangirl29:
~Narutofangirl29 Jun 24, 2009, 5:48:37 AM
I love the way you set it up
This is so frickin cool =]

--
It's always best to take a chance
you never know how
Perfect
something can turn out to be...

Check my Gallery!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:iconnenyeh:
=Nenyeh Jun 25, 2009, 2:31:18 AM
^_^ thanks and thanks for the fav too :hug:

--
:glomp:
I love glomps and random comments!!!
Join ----> =RawEm0tion
:iconcibbwin:
*Cibbwin Jun 26, 2009, 2:29:41 AM
I wish you had expanded on the ship references, but I really like the use of space here. I see all these emotions and phrases passing through the person's head in a blur, as such things usually happen.

--
It takes courage to enjoy it!
:iconnenyeh:
=Nenyeh Jun 26, 2009, 3:52:17 AM
^_^ Yeah I wish I had too but I thought that when I added it, it looked too...organized in a way. Glad ou liked the way it was set out, wasn't sure if many people would catch onto the idea behind that :hug:

--
:glomp:
I love glomps and random comments!!!
Join ----> =RawEm0tion
:iconcibbwin:
*Cibbwin Jun 27, 2009, 12:31:11 AM
Yay! I am observant! Hehe.

--
It takes courage to enjoy it!
Previous PageNext Page

Details

June 23
4.6 KB

Statistics

5
3 [who?]
41 (0 today)
1 (0 today)

Site Map

©2009 deviantART. All rights reserved
About Us | Contact Us | Site Tour | Help & FAQ Advertise | Services Etiquette | Privacy Policy | Terms of Service | Copyright Policy